"Ah, sorry, I don't know why I keep doing that. You just look like such a Dick to me."

So there’s this boy.

Let’s call him… Bob.

Then there is this other boy. Let’s call him Bend.

Then there this OTHER boy, and we are going to call him Bend-er.

THEN there is this OTHER boy, who we are going to call Chaz.

Then there is another boy who we are going to call Goose.

And THEN there is ANOTHER boy who will be called Justin Timberlake.

AND there is a boy who will be called Dr. Rick.

Lastly, there is PeterPan who has the nicest butt and who is slightly out of age range.






Bend thinks Lucy is really cute, and while Lucy thinks Bend is also really cute, she is not sure how she feels about him. Bend-er is a dangerous, mysterious, fine piece of yum, who may or may not be interested in Lucy, but Lucy would only be in it for the Dangerous HotPants-less Stuff. THEN there is Justin Timberlake, for whom Lucy has all kinds of unrequited (bitchassho) love for, and who is not around, THANK GOD or else her brain would explode. Then there is Chaz, who Lucy is in love with, sometimes for real, sometimes not, but he always seems to be in her head. Lastly, there is PeterPan who has the nicest butt and who is slightly out of her age range.

Doris wants Bob’s pants (Bob’s Hot, Hawt, PhuckinSexyGenius Pants), but we don’t know if Bob wants hers. Goose might want Doris’s pants, and while Doris WISHES she wanted Goose’s, it probably is not going to happen. Then there is Chaz, who makes Doris feel better about leaving Bridgetown and her Besty. THEN there is Dr. Rick, who Doris used to be really good friends with, and they wanted each others pantses for a time; this is no longer the case, and now both Lucy and Doris are really bothered by him, for some completely unknown douchey reason. Lastly, there is PeterPan who has the nicest butt and who is slightly out of her age range.

And then there is Ben. We LOVE Ben.

Lucy Wants: Paint+Wine+TomWaits+Thexx+MorePaintSlathered++Bend-erYum, Chaz 4always, no more Justin Timberlake, and PeterPan from the second star to the right and straight on till morning.

Doris Wants: IN Bob’s pants (Bob’s Hot, Hawt, PhuckinSexyGenius Pants), to kick Dr. Rick in the pants, to thank Chaz, PeterPan from the second star to the right and straight on till morning, and then to get the hells out and find LumberJackLuke from Montana.